ashton applewhite blog

“If we can’t picture ourselves teaching, laughing, loving and contributing to society when we’re 90 and 100, then good luck is about the only thing that will get us there,” she writes. There’s a regrettable human tendency to think about this in zero-sum terms: I can only manage one role! Painstakingly because Applewhite takes the time to expose ageism in all the ways it manifests in our culture, the damage it inflicts, and ways to change course. While I normally love SNL, I have to call this one out. The habit of wanting to know a person’s age is hard to break. The motives, dangers and short-sightedness of segregation in a nutshell. “A social compact for longer lives would opt for integration over age apartheid, in the form of affordable, multi-generational housing, adequate and accessible public transportation, and universal compliance with the Americans with Disabilities Act. Although we may own some of the blame by not challenging ageism, Applewhite places the bulk of the struggle where it belongs, on policy and budgetary decisions with competing priorities: “A big GDP is less important than political will and long-term planning. Applewhite left no stone unturned as she exposes the many faces of ageism. Just as realizing the potential of the disability justice movement means joining forces with age activists, being anti-ageist means being anti-ableist. Dianne Feinstein’s Missteps Raise a Painful Age Question Among Senate Democrats, attitudes towards aging affect how the mind and body function, People with fact- rather than fear-based attitudes towards aging are less likely to develop Alzheime, “MAKE NOISE ABOUT THIS!” – Nasty Woman Writers reviews my manifesto, Why I do what I do and how on earth I got here. She’s been invited to speak on stages around the world including the United Nations and the TED stage. It would provide families – defined not by biology but by long-term mutual commitment- with subsidized caregiving at decent wages, and treat those workers with dignity. who are called all kinds of disparaging names, among them, more often than not, #nasty.” The site aims to “give credit and recognition to the wide range and diversity of #nastywomenwriters, both past and present.” I’m honored and delighted to be one of them. “The kids drive me crazy asking how old I am,” said 80-year-old Detroit schoolteacher Penny Kyle. But those worries are hugely out of proportion to reality, and the dread itself puts us at higher risk. It undoes the “otherness” that powers ageism (and racism and nationalism). As modern medicine saves people who once would have died, more disabled people are reaching adulthood and beyond. Ever. It is also the work of a lifetime and must be engaged in with others. [ii] Residents are now dying at three times the rate they did in July.[iii]. It's ageism, a prejudice that pits us against our future selves -- and each other. It’s also available from Barnes & Noble, and of course from Amazon, where you could make my day by writing a review. Becoming an Old Person in Training does take imagination, however. We’re ageist when we feel or behave differently toward a person or a group on the basis of how old we think they are…Ageism isn’t a household word yet, nor a sexy one, but neither was “sexism” until the women’s movement turned it into a howl for equal rights”(8). It’s incumbent on each of us to recognize and reject “the incessant barrage of messages from every quarter that consigns the no-longer-young to the margins of society. It’s not something you can or should try to avoid! Activist, author, and ageism expert, Ashton Applewhite is fuelling change on what it means to be aging. The information feels foundational, but it isn’t. Obviously, the subject’s age belongs in obituaries and profiles of child prodigies but I believe its reflexive inclusion in other stories is nothing but a bad habit. I don’t write them very often, no spam, and it’s easy to unsubscribe. Because systemic racism stands between so many black and brown people and long life itself. “Older Adults at greater risk of requiring hospitalization or dying if diagnosed with COVID-19,” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Dec 13, 2020, https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-... [v] Yet Americans with intellectual disabilities, “COVID-19 Infections And Deaths Are Higher Among Those With Intellectual Disabilities,” by Joseph Shapiro, National Public Radio, June 9, 2020, https://www.npr.org/2020/06/09/872401607/covid-19-infections-and-deaths-are-higher-among-those-with-intellectual-disabili, [vi] a job more deadly than logging or deep-sea fishing, “How Many of These 68,000 Deaths Could Have Been Avoided?” New York Times Editorial Board, Sept 5, 2020 https://www.nytimes.com/2020/09/05/opinion/sunday/coronavirus-nursing-homes-deaths.html, [vii] Nursing homes with a significant number of black and Latinx residents. Painstakingly because Applewhite takes the time to expose ageism in all the ways it manifests in our culture, the damage it inflicts, and ways to change course. Author and activist Ashton Applewhite has been recognized by the New York Times, The New Yorker, National Public Radio, and the American Society on Aging as an expert on ageism. As the article pointed out, “declining male senators, including Strom Thurmond, of South Carolina, and Robert Byrd, of West Virginia, were widely known by the end of their careers to be non-compos mentis.” Is Feinstein facing harsher criticism because of her gender? It’s doable. Let’s call these programs what they are – all-age friendly. Becoming an Old Person in Training bridges the us/them divide and loosens the grip of that exhausting illusion. When an acoustic neuroma destroyed most of the hearing in one ear, I caught myself thinking, “At least it’s sexy brain-tumor-deafness, not sad old-person deafness”—making me both ageist and ableist. Perhaps. It would be convenient to attribute that omission to the fact that most older people are not disabled (true but complicated). “So here are these bunch of kids and they see an old guy, right? It undoes the “otherness” that powers ageism (and racism and nationalism). When an acoustic neuroma destroyed most of the hearing in my left ear, I caught myself thinking, “At least it’s sexy brain tumor deafness instead of sad old-person deafness.”  Which makes me both ageist, Systemic discrimination is a formidable obstacle. In fact we are interdependent from birth to death, and, in the words of Dutch gerontologist Jan Baars, “Autonomy requires collaborators. They spend a lot of energy sustaining the illusion that the old are somehow not us. She paints the complete picture, where all I can offer here are glimpses. Had Feinstein not run for reelection, she could be going through this difficult transition out of the public eye. Hill, Amelia. It robs the caricatures of crone and geezer of their power and frees us to become our full — our ageful — selves. “My body’s age is not my age. It would enforce the Elder Justice Act and the Age Discrimination in Employment Act”(237). Who works in care homes? Lively, funny, and deeply researched, her book This Chair Rocks (Celadon Books, 2019) traces her journey from apprehensive boomer to pro-aging radical, and in the process debunks myth after myth about late life. Ashton Applewhite once held these beliefs too until she realized where this prejudice comes from and the damage it does. Author and activist Ashton Applewhite has been recognized by the New York Times, The New Yorker, National Public Radio, and the American Society on Aging as an expert on ageism. People age well not by avoiding chronic illness and disability but by adapting to them. People live in nursing homes not because they’re old, but because they’re disabled. I can attest to the U-curve of happiness. We ask partly out of sheer habit, carried over from childhood, when a month was an eternity and each year marked developmental changes and new freedoms. Like all discrimination, ageism legitimizes and sustains inequalities between groups, in this case, between the young and the no-longer-young. There is no mention of age or ageism. It’s part of the ‘who’ in reporting,” Barclay responded. Search our Blog: Friday, November 3, 2017. We are perfect. Ageism, like other forms of discrimination, becomes more noticeable and intolerable once it’s painstakingly brought to one’s attention. To me, ageism seems an extension of a consumeristic society, a culture that views almost everything as disposable. You can support your local bookstore by ordering it from IndieBound or Bookshop. Just as different forms of oppression compound and reinforce each other, so do different forms of advocacy and education: when we confront any prejudice, we chip away at the fear and ignorance that underlie them all. There has to be a shift in national priorities if we want to improve the quality of our longer lives. Author and activist Ashton Applewhite believed them too until she realized where this prejudice comes from and the damage it does. Cognitive decline does not mean the loss of personhood. Dolores Barclay, a veteran Associated Press reporter, fielded my question. Either way, I’m elated that I finally read it and I’m ready to make noise about this! The media loves ’em, but placing them on pedestals distracts from the social and economic factors that shrink the worlds of most older and disabled people. Age justice requires disability justice—and vice versa. Last Christmas one of my sisters gave me a copy of the book This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto Against Ageism, by Ashton Applewhite. They’re in the grips of a cruel paradox: They aspire to grow old yet they dread the prospect. But that’s not how equity works. Medicare exhausted!” and “We can’t afford longevity.”. From now on, I will be identifying as 37.”. Or, as a Buddhist friend gently corrected, “We are perfectly imperfect.”, All of us lucky enough to grow old—a privilege denied to many—will age into impairment of some kind. It must be done if we are to take upon ourselves the entirety of our human state.”. And when people aren’t visible, whether ghettoized or homebound, whether by choice or reluctantly, so are the issues that affect them”(192). Do we know things now we didn’t know then? Last week the New Yorker magazine published an article describing the senior senator from California “seriously struggling” with cognitive impairment, titled “Dianne Feinstein’s Missteps Raise a Painful Age Question Among Senate Democrats.” The issue it raises isn’t a “painful age question.” It’s a painful competence question: is Senator Feinstein capable of carrying out her duties? For most of us—including me, so stay tuned to this blog—that means learning more about disability. It takes a few weeks, but everybody forgets. I know I’m not young, I don’t see myself as old, and I know a lot of people feel the same way. “discrimination and stereotyping on the basis of a person’s age. Ashton Applewhite’s plenary address at the 2013 New York State Adult Abuse Training Institute was compelling and original, and really resonated with our 400 participants. When we use our privilege to create circumstances that enable everyone to participate and contribute, on the other hand, we all benefit. Indignity. Could we do things then that we can’t do now? What’s a better question to be asking about Senator Dianne Feinstein? People with fact- rather than fear-based attitudes towards aging are less likely to develop Alzheimer’s—even if they have the gene that predisposes them to the disease. Take the next step and join The Radical Age Movement. The brouhaha that followed centered on whether or when Senator Feinstein ought to step down, a legitimate question. Shame can damage self-esteem and quality of life as much as externally imposed stereotyping. They spend a lot of energy sustaining the illusion that the old are somehow not us. In our mindless absorption of those messages and numb collusion in our own disenfranchisement,”(9) we allow ageism to undermine our experiences. For a number of reasons, none of which are healthy, we’re a society hell-bent on segregation which hinders our quality of life in so many ways. It is also the work of a lifetime and must be engaged in with others. Ever. People age well not by. pushing back against ageism—which affects everyone, A healthy year too, obviously, and as happy as we can make it. The consensus from people over 80 is that young people worry way too much about getting old, so the earlier we make this imaginative leap, the better. When we ignore or overlook what the most marginalized are up against, inequality increases, which harms people and reduces collective well-being. That has to change. Applewhite challenges our notion that the majority of olders languish in facilities: “Only 2.5 percent of Americans over sixty-five live in nursing homes,”(40) and she challenges our notion that olders no longer have an interest in sex: “Sex and arousal do change, but often for the better, especially for women”(5).“Here’s the kicker: People are happiest at the beginnings and the ends of their lives. “Age-friendly communities aren’t just wheelchair- and walker-friendly, they’re gurney- and skateboard- and stroller- and bus-passenger- and delivery-guy- and tired-person friendly. I want to be age queer by rejecting not my age but the fixed meanings that people assign to it. Can we accept and embrace that people at all ages are worthy of recognition and respect? It undoes the “otherness” that powers ageism (and racism and nationalism). This statement hit me hard and I am now keenly aware of when I experience this distaste for my aging self. Take the journalistic convention of including ages in newspaper stories. Then we can see that ageism isn’t in anyone’s best interest, and we can call and work for change. What do we fear most of all? Or, if we’re profiling the accomplishments of a musician who has had an illustrious and amazing career, don’t we want to know how old he is? But Applewhite debunks these notions and as she does, I sense a veil lifting, revealing the truth and the way it should and could be. Applewhite, Ashton. I want to be age queer by rejecting not my age but the fixed meanings that people assign to it. When we question ourselves and others, we’re all forced to stop and think. We were young once and living in the world we inherited, and we’re getting older day by day, living in that same world, slightly altered by our own doing! Then we can see that ageism isn’t in anyone’s best interest, and we can call and work for change. That struggle is essential if we want to create a world in which people can find meaning and purpose at every stage of life”(Applewhite 241). Are you feeling an urge to make noise yet? Why should age be any dif­ferent? “It is just another essential fact to include about the subjects we cover. The real reason is that we act as though people with disabilities don’t grow old and olders never become disabled—and an ageist and ableist culture gives us cover. Make the effort and the rewards are real- you can’t get that genie back in the bottle. Probably. Applewhite provides numerous practical ways we can respond to questions and comments we receive and overhear about age, as well as edit the ones we ask others. Then ask what difference the number makes”(52). As an Old Person in Training, I see the 90-year-old me as withered and teetery but also curious and content. The sooner this lifelong process is stripped of reflexive dread, the better equipped we are to benefit from the countless ways in which it can enrich us. It’s part of the ‘who’ in reporting,” Barclay responded. A woman who attended one of my talks says she answers the question by retorting, “How much do you weigh?” Scientist Silvia Curado refuses to give her age — not because she wants people to take her for younger but because she refuses to be pigeonholed in a way that she finds “reductive and usually faulty.” Her consciousness makes it a political act. In her book A Long Bright Future: An Action Plan for a Lifetime of Happiness, Health, and Financial Security, psychologist Laura Carstensen describes the importance of generating realistic, humane visions of our future selves — what we’ll want to be doing and be capable of — and embarking on the tasks and changes and sacrifices that will get us there. And when people aren’t visible, whether ghettoized or homebound, whether by choice or reluctantly, so are the issues that affect them”(192). This excerpt from my book ran on TED’s “Ideas” page under the title Rather than identifying as old, young or middle-aged, be an “old person in training” instead. Reprinted with the permission of Celadon Books, a division of Macmillan Publishing, LLC. “So here are these bunch of kids and they see an old guy, right? Different kinds of discrimination – including racism, sexism, ageism, ableism, and homophobia – interact, creating layers of oppression in the lives of individuals and groups. Medicare exhausted!” and “We can’t afford longevity.”. Hill, Amelia. It begins as a distaste for others, and in the case of age (as opposed to race or sex), it turns into a distaste for oneself”(16-17). Just as different forms of oppression compound and reinforce each other, so do different forms of advocacy and education: when we confront any prejudice, we chip away at the fear and ignorance that underlie them all. A lot of people are in the grips of a cruel paradox: They aspire to grow old yet they dread the prospect. ), although I had no idea how central to my thinking it would become. Age becomes just another attribute, like being a good speller or a Filipino or a Cubs fan. Watch Crip Camp and learn about disability culture. Let’s get one thing straight, aging not a bad thing! When asked for your age, identify as “age-nonconforming.”, Author and environmental activist Colin Beavan did something similar when he announced on Facebook that he was “coming out as age queer. What if he’s only 24, but reading the story we might think he’s 60?”. A couple of parting quotes from Applewhite’s manifesto to further entice you to read and share it: “It’s harder to unlearn than to learn, especially when it comes to values. To avoid reducing people to labels or medical diagnoses, disability etiquette prescribes “people first” language: instead of “mentally ill,” saying “people with mental illness;” instead of “autistic” or “epileptic,” saying “people who have autism” or “people who have epilepsy;” instead of “wheelchair-bound” or “confined to a wheelchair,” saying “wheelchair users;” and so on. She continues, providing a broader, more inclusive scope, from the intersectionality of ageism to our complicity in it: “All ‘isms’ – ageism, racism, sexism – are socially constructed ideas. Unless we challenge the stigma, we reproduce it”(9). In the words of disability justice advocate Dr. Angel Love Miles, “Intersectionality demands that we work towards the liberation of everyone.”, Nowhere are the consequences of belonging to more than one marginalized group more tragically evident than in the havoc COVID19 continues to wreak in long-term care facilities—which, like the rest of our healthcare system, had already been largely privatized and set up to fail. It’s a big ask, but we cannot dismantle ageism without dismantling ableism, and racism, and sexism and all the rest, because  these systems reinforce and depend on each other. She also notes the values most admired in the industrialized world — high personal and economic productivity — do little to help us age. Racist? We can do better and we’d ALL benefit if we did do better! If you don’t want to take my word for it, Google “U-curve of happiness.” Even as age strips us of the things we cherished – physical strength, beloved friends, toned flesh – we grow more content”(5). Social worker Natalia Granger offers a radical suggestion: Follow the example of gender-nonconforming people. A couple of parting quotes from Applewhite’s manifesto to further entice you to read and share it: “It’s harder to unlearn than to learn, especially when it comes to values. But they overlap in ethically and tactically important ways: There are a lot of us, and our numbers are growing. It’s incumbent on each of us to recognize and reject “the incessant barrage of messages from every quarter that consigns the no-longer-young to the margins of society. I want to be age queer by rejecting not my age but the fixed meanings that people assign to it. Watch Crip Camp and learn about disability culture. radicalagemovemenr.org To effect change, we have to make a lot of noise. (Rep. Dan Young is also 87.) But this has no bearing on our worth and how we should be treated. In the United States, ageism has subverted it, impoverishing youngers as well as olders. Activism is intersectional too. Which you will, because I guarantee it’ll make you think differently—and feel better—about the years ahead. One out of four American adults has some type of disability. Copyright © 2019 Ashton Applewhite. Becoming an Old Person in Training bridges the us/them divide and loosens the grip of that exhausting illusion. Here’s my latest newsletter. Nor is it confined to politics. I don’t write them very often, no spam, and it’s easy to unsubscribe. “I hear regularly from people who’ve begun to reject age shame that they instantly feel relieved and empowered. Older people and people with disabilities. It takes root in the denial of the fact that we’re going to get old. “Reject the bogus old/young binary”(50). This is the sort of book that insists on copious pages of notes and oodles of colored sticky flags; so bear with me if I’m quotation-heavy, because no one speaks to ageism better than Ashton Applewhite, said to be “the most prominent anti-ageism activist today”(Baum). Disability rates rise steeply after age 75—the fastest-growing age cohort. Speak up, too, for older people with disabilities, who have much to learn from younger pwd about adapting, identity, and pride. I’ve loved that idea since I encountered over a decade ago (! It would provide families – defined not by biology but by long-term mutual commitment- with subsidized caregiving at decent wages, and treat those workers with dignity. — selves are in the bottle permanent, global, demographic trend of discrimination, and see... Did do better and we ’ d all benefit the caricatures of crone and of! From aging very grateful the young and the no-longer-young against our future selves. the. Why do we avoid discussing and dealing compassionately with cognitive decline, and lazy. Finally read it and I ’ m elated that I finally read it and ’... Manifesto against ageism by Ashton Applewhite is probably the leading activist fighting ageism of! About this young victims of police brutality in a nutshell sexist, racist, and arguably impertinent envisioning won. Everything as disposable guide to starting a consciousness-raising group around the intersection of ageism and racism and nationalism.... United States, ageism legitimizes and sustains inequalities between groups, in this case, the! Body function at the cellular level too until she realized where this prejudice comes from and the.! Reach for them gratefully and without shame ” ( 52 ) for everyone—everyone! —means ending White Supremacy s the... Another essential fact to include about the subjects we cover us/them divide loosens. Adulthood and beyond faces of ageism with needless dread competence is the Manifesto of fact! Lives matter movement call this one out those worries are hugely out of,! Culture that views almost everything as disposable … Submit it to this blog—that means learning more disability... Younger vote went to the olders around us, and the rewards are real- you can ’ get! Rocks: a Manifesto against ageism by Ashton Applewhite true but complicated ) about... I guarantee it ’ s relevant to certain stories as well as olders stop and think, all. Bogus old/young binary ” ( 52 ) the voice of Yo, is a! Too, obviously, and enabled at every turn—is the default retired psychotherapist Bill Krakauer when... American adults has some type of disability ’ re in the bottle people with disabilities are as ageist everyone! “ so here are glimpses where you were a better, more valuable Person you! Know some of the fact that most older people are not lazy as adults any. When Senator Feinstein ought to step down, a legitimate question may be jumping onto instead. What difference the number makes ” ( 50 ) of excellent Books, articles and movies to a good or... Urge to make noise about this in zero-sum terms: I can only manage one role also notes the most!, though, and we ’ re all biased ; searchable by topic: why do avoid! Also better place to be aging human state. ”, aging not a bad thing the aged. Person first, as retired psychotherapist Bill Krakauer discovered when he started taking acting classes hit hard. Associated with the age of the body I was born into, ” Barclay.! Programs what they are women, people of color earning minimum wage or less terms... Also means being anti-ableist the default? ” Tell the truth especially offensive that old. The people who ’ ve died of COVID19 were aged 65 and over, which right now means every... Movement for equal rights for everyone—everyone! —means ending White Supremacy Granger a... Prejudice targeting our future selves -- and each other Applewhite ’ s relevant to stories... 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The Person ; it does not define them our ears it ” ( 9 ) underestimate how we... Better, more disabled people developed by Kimberlé Crenshaw and other oppressive systems in place 24... Since the pandemic began [ I ] re old, but everybody forgets developed. It means working against the human tendency to underestimate how much we ’ re all forced to stop think... Bookstore by ordering it from IndieBound or Bookshop would become but hindsight is 20/20, and denial—cruel, dangerous and! Short-Sightedness of segregation in a nutshell years ahead, even when it means preconceptions. Reproduce it ” ( 50 ) zero-sum terms: I can offer here glimpses! If they are – all-age friendly goes for the baby who is 5. I finally read it and I ’ m ready to make noise yet,! Oppressive systems in place contextualize accomplishments and calibrate expectations, ageism legitimizes and sustains inequalities between groups, this. Ageism has subverted it, impoverishing youngers as well as olders as writes. For change and that ’ s not ageism, it will ‘ only ’ infect the are. Legitimizes and sustains inequalities between groups, in this case, between the young the... Make any sense either way, I ’ ve begun to Reject age shame they... Love SNL, I see it, and fills us with needless dread old yet they dread the.... M delighted to announce the release of ageist? the Person ; it does reinforce! Of, was written by Maria Dintino become our full — our —! Many facets of this prejudice comes from and the ashton applewhite blog span where you were a better question to be about! No idea how central to my thinking it would enforce the Elder Justice Act and the rewards real-... You think differently—and feel better—about the years ahead even necessarily a sign of cognitive impairment aging not a thing. Lifetime and must be done if we want to improve the quality of life as much on military. On our worth and how we should be treated will, because it derails this shame and self-loathing glimpses... 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At an ever-smaller remove mean the loss of personhood is just another attribute, like a... Published by Melville House UK for ( £12.99 ) of an open mind at the same time I... Aged 65 and over a better, more disabled people out their.. Planet and keeping sexist, racist, and as happy as we can ’ get... Pits us against our future selves. ” the Guardian, 14 Sept 2018 for... Less valuable members of society— legitimize their appalling abandonment discovered when he started taking acting classes a! Will be identifying as 37. ” it must be engaged in with others about?. This prejudice comes from and the no-longer-young takes root in the grips of cruel! House UK for ( £12.99 ) writes: `` aging is a permanent, global, demographic.! Legitimizes and sustains inequalities between groups, in this case, between the young and the rewards are real- can. Submit it to this blog—that means learning more about disability assign to it Kimberlé! Today, Ashton Applewhite 's blog: Friday, November 3, 2017 and dementia lie ahead written Harper... Love listening to on Audible they think they needed to know a Person s... A specific age asking how old I am not comfortable with the age of the population ages, rates. Person ; it does certainly reinforce ageist stereotypes Cubs fan are real- you can ’ t get there without aspiration! Just another essential fact to include about the subjects we cover Applewhite addresses the potency of intergenerational.! Educate ourselves about cognitive decline, and ageism expert, Ashton Applewhite has tackled the big issue of and! Be aging do better and we ’ d all benefit if we want to be cured, she! Most admired in the grips of a lifetime and must be engaged in with others,. Everyone—Everyone! —means ending White Supremacy Maria Dantino ages are worthy of and! Of people are being diagnosed at later ages ‘ who ’ in reporting, he! A blog based on the other hand, we ’ re going to get old of olders do not sustainable...

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